Bridal Shower Saturday Dress

Today is my friend's bridal shower, and I just finished my shabby apple-inspired dress last night! So i get to wear it!

I really like this dress. I fits me really well, and it is SOOO comfy. Take that Shabby Apple! I wanted to make the neckline a V-neck with the rose on top so my neckline would lengthen, making my chest look smaller. The empire waist emphasizes the smallest part of me, and the skirt has a slight a-line which balances my top-half. I'm thinking i look pretty hot. The sunglasses help.

It didn't take me very long to make because I didn't have to make any new patterns. The bodice and waistband are from my evening gown, the sleeves are from Cassandra, and the rose detail is from Piper. Pattern pieces are so easy to mix and combine, even if you use pre-made patterns. If you don't like a skirt of a dress, just use a different one! It's all about trial and error, and I'm relieved this dress made it through those adjustments so it is actually wear-able. Have a great weekend!

Sacrifice

The 1st time I went to New York City was in middle school with my family for a New Year's Eve trip. I remember running down a side street after a late night movie trying to find the dropping ball as people's screams and cheers led us to Time's Square. We were stopped by police and I never saw the glittery sphere, and my tears were those of pure joy as I felt the New York spirit running through me as I ran through it holding my older brother's hand.

The 2nd I was in New York was last year with my sewing teacher, the Doc. She takes sewing students every year for a week long trip of appointments with industry leaders and tons of fabric shopping (I brought home close to 50 yards). I was sick with a sinus infection the entire trip, ended up in the hospital for an afternoon, and missed my husband a lot as it was the 1st we were apart since our wedding a year before. It was one of the largest learning experiences in my life, and I've debated over and over again whether to go again this summer. Of course I can't afford it and of course I need to be responsible, but I can't stop thinking about the smell of the tiny fabric stores with piles of piles of pure cotton gold and luxurious silks all about 1/4 of the price anywhere else.

I believe it is safe to say that I am in love with New York City for the same reasons all people fall in love: the exciting pursuit of ideas, thoughts, people that could bring one success and complete joy and satisfaction. I feel I have a story about every single part of New York that I've been in: The Iranian woman in the fabric store defending Hillary Clinton's pant suits; The Kips Bay House that had endless artistic expression and the coldest tap water I've ever tasted; My haircut in the middle of Sachs Fifth Avenue with shoppers applauding my daring new chin-length bob when I was 15. So many reasons.

Today in my fashion history class a classmate was talking about her exciting job interview she had in NYC the past month for a position as a job designer-- EVEN though she doesn't have a design degree, and EVEN though she has no real design experience-- all just like me. My heart pitter pattered over the fact that if this girl had a chance in the fashion world in a top company, well then gosh darn it so did I. The entire class my mind traveled back to NYC as I dreamed of the life I could have if I ever applied for a design job....not just me, but Steve too...and future kids...going off to private school on the subway...designer duds...my designer duds.

Steve and I discussed the possibilities over our salad bar creations at Jason's Deli. Dreams meet reality. He would have to quit his job and move out there with no connections as a civil engineer. "But you could work on bridges! And New York is all roads ready to be designed. How could you not find a job?"

Apparently, it's not that easy. And neither is meeting reality.

Obviously, we could never move to New York even if I did get a design job and could cover the rent while Steve job hunted. He is the rational one. He thought of the worst case scenario: being in debt, me getting pregnant and having to quit my job, and him being jobless. "It would be a nightmare".

Nightmare? New York? The place where sinus infections feel like drinking the best tap water of your life? "You can't say it wouldn't be fun, at least. A real adventure for us to take on." I didn't understand why we needed to play it safe. We're young. Best time of our lives to move to New York and live the dream.

And yet, I knew my insistence of at least finding jobs there wasn't about meeting reality, it was about accepting the sacrifice I made when I tied the knot. Did i mention that my classmate was single? No?

I have a hard time accepting the role I am in now as a married woman with another person to think about in every decision that I make, knowing that if I weren't married, I could  and I would  leave at a moment's notice if I got a job at Betsy Johnson, and I wouldn't look back. Lying in bed, I told Steve about the sacrifice I made marrying him, and that I love him enough to give up my New York dreams, running through the streets...

"Just promise me we'll go to New York someday to visit. And that you'll love it just as much as I do, and it will be dream-like and unreal the fun we are having there. And you won't complain about how expensive it is."

"Of course". He knows my sacrifice, and is ready to sacrifice, too.

When did I become such a wuss?

Sorry about yesterday's post. I was having a weak moment. I needed to release some pent up frustration and worry, my husband was working and i had already called about three times to talk, and so YOU were my only outlet. aren't you lucky.

Sadly, I did not win. I got an email from my teacher, announcing the winner, and my name was not there. I broke down for about 5 minutes, and then Steve (the hubs) did come home, and for some reason I wasn't that sad at all. I knew I still had options, and erinrose's comment on my last post sums it up: I can still sew these dresses myself, sell them on Etsy or my own website, and the capital will come from that to manufacture and start a real clothing line.

Obciously, this will take some time. But i am taking comfort in the fact that if i advertise right, continue blogging, that these dresses will sell and i WILL be that millionaire in five years, and those judges will see the mistake they made!!!


Dramatic, yes. But that's the trend these days. 

For whatever reason I didn't win, I know that it had nothing to do with my actual product. Because it's great. And no one can tell me otherwise!!!!


let's not get carried away...

I feel....slightly defeated.

I woke up a half hour earlier this morning, being so nervous for my presentation today. The night before i had stayed up till 1 am finishing courtney's/ sample dress. It looks great, and i'll post pictures soon.

I racked my brain as I fell asleep last night on what i was going to wear to present. I mean, if i'm making a clothing line, i have to look GOOD, right? I decided on one of the 1st dresses i ever made, some fishnets, and my favorite gray heels. A random honda honked at me as i walked to school, so i took that as a good sign about my appearance.

As a last minute decision, i made up a swatch board so the judges could touch all the types of fabrics i wanted to use for the line. i was so restless before i left i cleaned the entire apartment (all 400 square feet of it) and ate a bag of candy out of nervousness. I was oddly not hungry at all. it must have been the adrenaline.

All the presenters were running late, and i was grateful for the extra 10 minutes to just relax. When i was called into the room, i almost passed out. I walked in and saw all the judges (5 women, 1 man) and i went to set up my powerpoint. Just my luck, i had technical difficulties and all the beautiful Poor Richard font i had planned was lost as i had to use a different computer than my own (darn HP!!!). Instead, the arial font screamed "mediocre' to the judges in bold type. great...

My presentation breezed by. I was spewing numbers and words that i had rehearsed over and over in the shower earlier in the morning. I pointed out zipper details, passed around the sample, explained how i would become a millionaire in 5 years, showed comments written by YOU, MY READERS (which deserves a Honda honk itself because it just boosts my clothing line so much!) about how much you just love this idea, and before i knew it i was taking questions.

questions that i cant even remember an hour later.

Luckily, i had anticipated most of the questions and had special "set aside" slides that I showed to address them. The panel asked about prices, cost, shipping, returns... and i only answered "i dont know" to one. My husband said that was better than making something up and looking stupid. All in all, it went well.

Strangely enough, i'm not relieved that it is over at all. And i'm not fishing for compliments when I saw I dont think i'll win. It has nothing to do with the judges questions, or my overall presentation, or my smokin' hot outfit. it's just a feeling of unrest, doubt, and over all defeat knowing that these 6 people have my fate in their hands. i automatically saw the other finalists when I was leaving and i just had a wave emotion that can only be labeled as insecurity. The fact that I've never wanted or needed anything else in my whole life than this prize money to start a postpartum clothing line makes me feel desperate and unsure of myself...which i dont like feeling.

I just want to know if i've lost or not so i can move on with my life and make new plans about what i am going to do after college.

But for today I'll go to the temple with my husband, go shopping on friday, and go to me best friend's bridal shower on saturday. This is all i have planned so far.

To Do List

My 10x12 living room/sewing room/dining room 1 am last night and 11 am this morning:

This weekend I have to:

- prepare my presentation

- finish business plan changes

- write a 10 page research paper on female comedians and neo-burlesque attitudes

- finish CJane's dress/ sample dress for presentation

Pray for me and my sanity.

Rolling On

TO appease Courtney and her horrified expression of the gorgeous photo I put up of her in her bodice, I decided to put myself up this morning without make-up, not even a brush in my hair. SO there ya go, Court! You aren't alone now!

This is my shabby-apple inspired dress I started about three weeks ago. I got the skirt fabric in the mail (a stretch cotton suiting..delicious), the waistband is a stretch wool, and then the top is stretch cotton poplin. I was relieved when the light bulb went on yesterday and realized I wouldnt need a zipper in this dress (since zippers are my lot in life) and the waistband was stretchy enough to go over my ample bust. I still need to add the sleeves, the rose detail on Center Front, and hem (hem quite a bit). I tend to over shoot my estimates on how long I need my dresses. I guess that's better than cutting out too little fabric. Hopefully my finished product will have some make-up on its model.

I also managed to cut out Courtney's bodice out of her fashion fabric! I have to get this dress done by tuesday so I can use it as a sample in my presentation that day. I love this print (and so does Court)!

Ides of March

Courtney, of CJane fame, is preggers. Making her postpartum dresses is such a joy for me, not only because of the learning experience of fitting a dress to someone else's body, but she is just so nice, so genuine, and I REALLY like coming over to her house. I've done about 4 fittings already, and I just don't want them to stop! 

Sadly, today was probably the last real fitting I'll do. I managed to make the perfect bodice muslin mock-up of the pattern i'll be using for all five of her dresses. The bodice will have enough ease around the bust so that if her bust grows after pregnancy, she'll have enough room to grow without looking like she is wearing a muumuu everyday (which is my goal of this whole project, after all).

I have to say that I am REALLY proud of myself. I have never fit another person's body before, and it really wasnt as scary as i thought it would be. Strangly enough, it is very simple when I apply everything i have learned in my classes. I did take a big jump, but i knew how to land safely without breaking anything along the way. 

Still to do: widen the bust width. The bust width is the area above the bust and under the neckline. It was pulling on Courtney, which is why I let out the shoulder seams in the picture. I have to add about 1" to both seams on the bodice to make it fit the way I want, and so it is comfortable. I also need to shorten the bust in the front to make it fit like a real empire waistline.

Other than that, I'm good to go with the cutting out the fashion fabric (which is the actual dress fabric I'll be using). We decided today to make one of the dresses out of a great denim I bought at Yellow Bird on Saturday. I hope to have the first dress done by next Tuesday, so that I can use it in my Business Plan Competition presentation that day (i'm still extremely nervous for that!). Keep those fingers crossed people!

new friends

Saturday I met up with the adorable Sara, her mom, and equally adorable sister Chloe to talk about sewing. They found my blog through cjane, and Sara is an inspired and obsessed little 13-year-old just like I was about clothes, and her mom was so cool to contact me and ask me to meet her daughters. 

Sara had questions prepared and ready for me to answer, and I have to admit that it was nice to have a little audience to preach to about sewing. I gave her some simple advice and homework to start on now with sewing and learning about fashion so that she can be 10 times more prepared than I am when she reaches the ripe-old age of 22.

But of course, we digressed about Masterpiece Theater, Mr. Darcy, Shakespeare, and London. Kindred spirits we are.

Meeting the next generation of seamstresses and designers is the greatest of pleasures. Out of everything I do, to inspire and help someone who I was so like at that age is my goal. 

My advice for Sara (and all beginning sewers):

1. Experiment with sewing. Experiment any way you can (even if all your messed-up clothes go hide in a suitcase). 

2. Get to know fabrics.

3. Gain inspiriation from other designers

4. Draw and write about clothes everyday. EVERYDAY SARA!

I Am a Cottage Capitalist

I have made it to the finals of the BYU Home Based Business Plan Competition, for a line of postpartum dresses to be sold through an online store. 

**insert jumping for joy and calling everyone I know here**

But that's only half the battle. 

I have to present my plan and ideas March 23rd to a panel of judges, with 3 other finalists. Yikes. I must win their hearts and minds to get the 5 grand. 

Bribing with cookies is not an option, nor is it allowed. 

I'll be very busy the next couple of weeks. Please pray for my sanity and my husband's patience.

Life is hard, but i can do hard things. i think.

Impatience

Dear Fashion Fabrics Club:

Where is my black stretch cotton I ordered a week and a half ago? My card has been charged, my receipt emailed, and i need to finish my Apple-almost-shabby dress.  I cant walk around skirt-less, FFC. I need my fabric. Just please, send it to me!

I also bought this darling cotton sateen:

 So i better get my WHOLE order FFC. no skimping!

Seriously, how long does it take to cut fabric
??????

-trying-to-be-patient Ellen

Sew it to me, baby

Eva from Sew it to Me featured my blog and sewing projects today! We had a great chat over the phone about fabric, getting pregnant, style, and other girly-girl topics. My husband and I are planning a trip to LA to hunt for fabrics this summer, so we have to meet up, Eva!!

I'll know on Tuesday or Wednesday if I get through to the Business Plan finals!!! CROSS FINGERS!

What A Night

Yesterday in my basic entrepreneurship class my teacher mentioned a home-based business plan comeptition that the Business School does every year. Participants have to have a plan that would work in the home, and the winner gets $5000.

Me ears perked.

My thoughts about my clothing line for postpartum women ran through my head.

I knew I had to enter.

Making postpartum dresses for cjane has really got me thinking the past few weeks of this unidentified market of postpartum women that are in between wearing their maternity wear and wearing normal clothing. The reaction I have been getting in comments and emails about my postpartum dresses had convinced me enough as of last night that starting a postpartum dress line would be a great first project.

Too bad the business plan for the competition was due at 5pm that day. My heart sank when my teacher told me after class.

"But come up to my office and I'll show you the winner's from last year business plan. Maybe you could whip something up in 2 hours!"

Her enthusiasm for my idea was flattering, but slightly over optomistic. A business plan in 2 hours? How about 7.

THankfully, the ladies in the entrepreunership office let me turn it in the next morning. I stayed up till 3 am writing about future sales, ideas, stats. This part of the whole put a little damper on my business dreams, but it was totally beneficial to actually put in numbers and make a real concrete plan out of my intangbile ideas. where was I going to get a manufactureer? How much would it cost me up front? these kinds of questions aren't really thought of by an artist like myself.

These 7 hours and this project is another reason why I love BYU so much. It encourages art and creativity far beyond any other school I have seen, while still maintaining a sense of reality in all the projects. My teachers have always prodded my creative mind to see how it can stretch, but then they always follow up and say, "now can this actually be feasible? do your research! you will be in the real world soon!"  My fantasies of being the next Kate Spade will only go so far if I dont have all the numbers crunched and consider reality. 

So I was at Kinkos at 2:30 getting my business plan bound.

I might cry if I don't get to the final round of the competition when we give presentations to the panel with more details about the business. I might cry.

here are some designs that I am doing for cjane: They all have buttons or a zipper down center front for easy breastfeeding accessibility. How clever. These are more or less good representations of what cjane will be wearing.